November 9, 2015

A River Runs Through Me

For a few months now I have written about what I have learned or discovered in life as I approach 50. My life feels like a river flowing down a mountain stream. Shaped by the rush of time and rocks and obstacles. The Lord has created ways for me to learn who He is and who I am in Him on this river. Many times I capsized and thought I was drowning. Other times I am just riding the rapids watching Him rescue and guide me around what could have destroyed me. The river has power to give and take life, the power to reshape and change direction. So much out of my control and yet God made the river, allowed it to go here and not there, to be calm and to rage, to give and take away. But the river is in the hands of One supremely wise, all-powerful, faithful, good, eternal, compassionate.

The river has caused me  admit failures and outright disobedience. I have felt vulnerable sharing my sexual abuse and my wounded, roaring responses that flowed from it over the years. The Lord has redirected my river to overflow into the the lives of others, but mainly married women who have experienced sexual abuse in their past leading to distrust of their own decisions, others’ intentions, and God’s ability to protect that matters most to them.

What do I have to offer?

There are so many walking wounded in this area – barely holding on, pasting on smiles for others, wanting to be normal, to be loved. The Lord has taught me and brought me to a place of surrender and growing trust in Him. I want to share that.

To that end, I am now working on a prayer journal that walks women through the lies they have believed, triggers that set them in motion, and the truths the Word reveals to replace them – put into practice. “Restoring Sanity to Your Chaos” includes journal pages for that process, with other worksheets to build a “God Biography”, “Who I Am In Christ” framework, and “Others” (how to respond to them and treat them). It presents Bible reading plans and methods of study since you can’t apply what you have never read. There are links to online concordances and Bible Study tools found all over the web, finished off with “What’s the Point?” explanations that help pull it all together.

These tool flows from my love of teaching the Word and the Lord prompting me to begin creating helps to pass on truth and encourage and guide others to heal as they encounter God’s Word daily. I am truly enjoying this process, being very intentional to remember the path I have walked to be where I am on the healing journey with the Lord. I do not want to just tell what I have learned though. I want to equip women so they can grow in their walk with the Lord and be able to pass it on to others who also need it. I cannot be everywhere, but I pray what He has me create will be paid forward to places I could never imagine – all for the Lord’s glory!

I would absolutely LOVE your feedback on what I have shared as well as what these tools should include

  • How would using the journal mentioned help you?
  • What more could I include to make them more useful to you?
  • What topics would you like to see and learn about? (Where is your foundation weak and what do you struggle to believe?)
  • What format works best for you? (pdf, printables, website, email, hard copies mailed to you)
  • What would make this easiest for you to share with others?

My 50 Year Discover Series has shown me there is not a place in my life untouched by sexual abuse. The Lord has enabled me to trust, learn, and grow through it to the place where I am very aware of when a lie has jumped in and is running the inner dialogue and behavior. The time between that and repentance and re-surrender to His truth and ways is growing smaller and smaller. Living forward in Him means releasing the past into His hands, learning to trust His protection, power, and will for me through every trial and mountain, failure, wound or success. God has used every ounce of my life to grow me into the woman He desires me to be – reflecting Him, sharing with others, glorifying His name. The river gives life now and flows to others for which I am eternally thankful!

You, too,  can learn to trust His will and ways, freeing yourself up to love others, and truly enjoy the presence of God in every part of your life – today AND for every tomorrow. It all starts with emailing me at: and scheduling a “Discovery” 50 minute exploratory session.

Welcome to the safe place where an Unchanging God Changes You!