As a life coach I help others break down what is going on and what they would like to try or change or work on to move forward. But today I find myself on a journey of surrendering food to the Lord – again. This comes after a weight loss of 40 pounds 10 years ago that I kept off for 6 years – and then regained 30 in the last 4. Ugh.
Every day starts out well, with good intentions. Then it ends with a snack-fest driven by anxiety and discouragement and another day working harder to connect with people online, despite lack of response to what everyone tells me is the right stuff. Be patient they say – it will happen. I keep thinking I should be doing something more or different. Was I wrong to think the Lord was leading me here? What am I doing wrong or what should I try next? All I want to do is connect women to the Lord through His Word, encouraging them to have joy in whatever He has created, called, and equipped them to do, making plans to for an intentional impact/legacy – wherever that is.
Then there is the house. Beautiful view. Cabin feel. In the mountains of Tennessee. Yet still so much to do so we can use it the way we want to to serve others and welcome visitors. The repairs are steady and done well, but s-l-o-w. John, my husband, is in the midst of allergy immunity shots and is tired every night, allergies within and without – it is August in the mountains. Again, I say, “UGH!”
Finding my place in a new place when I am approaching 50 is harder than I anticipated. New church, new ministries, new house, new people, new career. Distance from family and familiar – both in distance and culture. Looking for where I plug in in all the new is daunting for an introvert who had all her peeps and family around her and then God moves her to where others do not know her or her gifts or strengths. Learning everything new about building a website, running a business, gaining the trust of others who I so desperately what to help. Facebook and Twitter and Blog Posts and Newsletters. Overwhelmed – everything is a new thing to learn or grow in.
I am out of my comfort zone in so many ways and my waist is expanding. I am taking stock of where my energy is going and realize I am eating away my fears and frustrations with chips and candy and second helpings. My joints even ache and my feet feel puffy. I mean, really, does this sound like a person who should be helping others move forward with joy and purpose? What is God up to in my life? Why is everything feeling like walking through mud up to my knees? What needs to change – what has to change because this cannot go on any longer. I am fighting for joy doing what I thought I was SUPPOSED to be doing, living where I WANTED to live, being a part of a church that is challenging me to grow deeper in the Lord.
So I prayed and I bought a book to help me process: Life, Emotions, Goals, My relationship with the Lord, Ministry, Career, and Expectations. The Lord’s Table eating plan returns from 10 years ago and the Rebounder emerges from the closet. Being intentional, surrendering all the things I cannot control to a God who is in total control, who knew every one of my days before one came to be. Surrendering my right to have things be what I want or think they should be – is this MY world or God’s? Learning to enjoy the small steps of progress in our home. Believing that if God led me to coaching, then He will use me – it just may look way different than I thought it would. Being thankful. Being in the Word. Letting the Lord repair my worn out body, mind, and soul.
I invite you into my world and my story over the next 40 days as I pray, journal, seek to be accountable to others, and surrender all that weighs me down, while maybe being a little less round in the middle. What kind of a coach would I be if I too did not need to re-assess, gain new vision, set goals and work through obstacles, so I can live for the Lord as He has created, called, and is continually equipping me to do?
May the Lord use it to encourage you and me both as we seek to align our hearts and lives with His. I will give updates at the end of every blog for the next 7 weeks. I would love it if you can pray for me to keep my eyes on the Lord and my heart hungering and thirsting for Him instead of believing food can ever replace my need for Jesus. Nothing is better than Jesus. Nothing. Lord, help me live like I believe it!
What can I be praying for you to overcome? How can I walk you through your own path of awareness and discovery, strategies and actions, accountability leading to your “what next” and beyond?
If this is not where you are in any life area, then share it with others who you know might need encouragement or want to move forward into new areas or revamp old areas to be used by the Lord with more intention and impact.
Share, +1, Retweet – yes I am now on Twitter. Look forward to hearing from you!
Website: www.unchanginggodchangingyou.com Email: kristin@unchanginggodchangingyou Phone: 423-743-0032 (Leave message and I will get back to you.) Facebook Message: www.facebook.com/unchanginggodchangingyou